SHOULD HAVE STAYED IN BED

The day started off well--completed my four-mile walk, went to the tennis court and actually hit great with seemingly extra power. My mom needed a lot of stamps, and I needed to weigh a special birthday card I would soon be mailing, so offered to go to the post office. Although the customer service area was not opened at 7:30 on Saturday, I weighed my letter but didn’t want to buy stamps out of the machine so went to the drug store next door. No, they didn’t sell any, but I could get them at the grocery store across the street. No big deal. I needed to buy some groceries anyway.

Searched the pork section for the bone-in chops on sale but found a reasonable boneless pork roast. Then found the pork chops. Which one? Asked the butcher which had the least amount of waste like I didn’t already know. The roast, of course. Down to the boxes of frozen fish. Deciding between lemon pepper and garlic herb--garlic herb was breaded, hence less fat. Oh, but boxes of southern style breaded fish were specially marked down. Grabbed several boxes and informed the lady searching through the Gorton fish section about my find. She snatched the last two boxes and seemed appreciative. I got the rest of my items and headed toward the checkout aisles.

It never fails. You go to the store early to avoid the crowds to find only one lane opened. Fortunately it wasn’t long before another lane opened up. Several moved over but I stayed put. A young gentlemen caught my attention and said he would help me over on the next aisle. He scanned a box of fish a few times but nothing happened. I told him they were marked down and showed him the sticker. He entered two boxes of fish but scanned them on the wrong department code and couldn’t correct his mistake so he got another checker to assist him. He proceeded to scan the roast. No luck there either and entered the code. The price rang up as $309.00. (Wow, what an expensive cut of meat!) With all the key punching he only managed to cut the price by a third. He kept apologizing, and I tried to reassure him that I had been there before, and I had--during the grocery strike at Ralph’s three years ago. I kindly suggested starting over again, but he was not receptive to that idea. The same checker returned and after a few futile attempts said it was best to start over. (Gee, why didn’t I think of that?) So I wouldn’t have to wait much longer, this sweet gal decided to scan all the items and then went back to her cashiering duties on the next aisle. With all the turmoil I’m amazed I didn’t forget about the stamps. I inserted the discount card and my debit card in the machine. My part was completed and kept waiting and waiting and waiting. The young man finally admitted this was his first day. Such a nice kid. A cute kid. An embarrassed kid. I was beginning to have chest pains and hoped I was that caring to actually be aching for him but think I was just getting a little too hungry. Again, he had to call over his coworker. She apologized and seemed a little embarrassed for all of us. I headed out the door and thought I should check my receipt. Oops. My discount card didn’t go through. There I was again. The supervisor gave me a refund but seemed somewhat annoyed but she had no clue what I had just endured. At least I got a bargain on the fish.

With grocery bags, purse, tennis racket, and car keys in hand, I stopped at the locked entrance of my apartment complex. I usually have my apartment keys in hand but this time wasn’t carrying two one-gallon milk cartons. Reached into my pocket and felt around amidst the cards, cash and receipt but no keys. I could hear them rattling and put everything on the ground including the contents of my pocket. The keys weren’t there but could still hear the rattling. The keys had fallen through a hole and were at the bottom of my left sweatpant leg. Without looking too idiotic (which was hard to do at this point) and praying that no one was watching, I tried to get the keys out without ripping out my pant leg. After several attempts I managed to push the keys up my pant leg until I could get them back through the hole. Yes, I definitely should have stayed in bed.